Of all of the celebrities that have died in the last week, I feel most strongly for Billy Mays.
“Wait, what the hell?”
Is this guy nuts? Why? To be honest, I’m not really quite sure. Maybe it was because he sold products that enriched and fulfilled the lives of the average American who can’t live without excess consumer goods. Maybe it was because he built a name and a career for himself on something that most people can’t stand [see: infomercial]. Hell, maybe it was that youthful, spritely beard. That beard holds secrets and wisdom, my friends.
No, I suspect that it’s because he was the most down to earth of all of them. And to me, he didn’t just define a genre of an art, he created a genre of art. That’s right, the art of the infomercial. As much as I can’t believe those words are coming out of my mouth (please forgive me, mom), a lot of creative vision goes into creating the screamo ads that sell you those hallowed things that you can’t live without. And no one mastered that creative vision like Billy Mays. Sorry Anthony Sullivan, but he’s got you.
So, here’s an OxyClean toast to Billy Mays: your obnoxious yet oddly compelling voice and personality will be sorely missed by all late night TV’ers everywhere.
Now where’s that bottle of Kaboom…
